{"id":28820,"date":"2020-10-25T10:56:30","date_gmt":"2020-10-25T17:56:30","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/lapost.us\/?p=28820"},"modified":"2020-10-25T10:57:23","modified_gmt":"2020-10-25T17:57:23","slug":"how-to-maintain-strong-friendships-as-you-move-through-your-career","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lapost.us\/?p=28820","title":{"rendered":"How to Maintain Strong Friendships as You Move Through Your Career"},"content":{"rendered":"

What the science of regret says about work\u2013life balance and prioritizing close relationships.<\/h3>\n
BASED ON THE RESEARCH AND INSIGHTS OF\u00a0Neal J. Roese<\/a><\/div>\n
\n

For many on ambitious career paths, long hours\u2014and maybe a relocation or two\u2014are a given. And while those may be good choices, says\u00a0Neal Roese<\/a>, a professor of marketing at the Kellogg School, keep in mind that if your closest friendships are a casualty of your busy schedule, you will likely come to regret it.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

\n

Roese is a leading expert in the science of regret, how to avoid it, and how to use it to make choices that will bring you satisfaction in the long run.<\/p>\n

\u201cThere\u2019s a tendency to neglect one of the most important aspects of our well-being, which is our connection to others,\u201d says Roese, author of the book\u00a0<\/em>If Only<\/em><\/a>. \u201cWe\u2019re finding that people frequently regret losing these personal connections.\u201d<\/p>\n

Nonromantic relationships are particularly susceptible to benign neglect. \u201cWe all understand that we need to invest in our relationship with our spouse or partner,\u201d says Roese. \u201cWhat might be not so obvious is that maintaining close friendships takes effort, too, and that the effort is worth it.\u201d<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

\n
\n
\n
So what can even the busiest among us do to keep our friends close and our life as regret-free as possible? Roese offers some research-backed strategies.<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n

Know Thyself\u2014and the Limits of Facebook<\/strong><\/p>\n

We all desire security, purpose, romance, partnership, and fulfilling work. Yet when these drives collide\u2014the drive to search for fulfilling work versus, say, a desire to stay connected to the people already around us\u2014we do not always choose what would ultimately have made us happiest.<\/p>\n

\u201cPeople aren\u2019t necessary good at\u00a0predicting their own emotional reactions<\/a>\u00a0to the outcomes of the choices they make,\u201d Roese says. \u201cIn retrospect, however, they can see what mattered most.\u201d<\/p>\n

And what does matter most? While plenty of professionals have career- and education-related regrets, Roese\u2019s\u00a0own research<\/a>\u00a0finds that some of our most intense regrets have to do with losing touch with friends.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

\n
\n
For Roese, this means people should work harder to maintain the relationships that mean the most to them\u2014and not just by liking someone\u2019s vacation photos on Facebook. \u201cWhat we see is a longing for a close<\/em>\u00a0connection,\u201d he says. \u201cIn the age of social media, we can call lots of people friends, but what people miss when they\u2019ve lost [that close connection] is a friend close enough to share intimate life details with. This is common with friendships that were important to people in their twenties and that fall away in their forties or fifties. People in their twenties might not realize how many life forces will push them away from their friends as they get older.\u201d<\/div>\n<\/article>\n<\/div>\n
\n

Put In the Effort<\/strong><\/p>\n

One of the simplest ways to preserve a close friendship is to make a point of keeping it on your schedule.<\/p>\n

\u201cAs people start getting caught up in work and family life, the first thing to go is the weekly or monthly beer you used to have with your friend,\u201d Roese says.<\/p>\n

This tends to be especially tricky for men. There is an interesting gender\u00a0difference in the literature<\/a>\u00a0on how people keep friendships, Roese explains. Women are better at preserving one-on-one connections, known\u2014to social psychologists, anyway\u2014as dyads. \u201cDyadic connections are a specialty of women,\u201d Roese says, \u201cwhereas men tend to be better at forming small groups, such as sports teams. Men need\u00a0an extra nudge<\/a>\u00a0to preserve time for one-on-one friendships.\u201d<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

\n

\u201cRegret hurts, and so our immediate reaction is often to ignore it. But you might also listen to the signal that\u2019s inside that regret.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<\/div>\n

\n

Be Ambitious but Preserve What You Value<\/strong><\/p>\n

But preserving friendships does not necessarily mean limiting one\u2019s ambition or refusing to chase opportunities that might disrupt one\u2019s sense of community. In fact, the literature around regret suggests that risk-takers are rewarded with greater feelings of satisfaction.<\/p>\n

\u201cThere\u2019s plenty of research to show that when we have an opportunity and take it, we\u2019re less likely to feel regretful, because we\u2019re very good at reconciling ourselves to what unfolds. When we\u00a0don\u2019t<\/em>\u00a0take opportunities, however, we\u2019re haunted by what might have been.\u201d<\/p>\n

In\u00a0one study<\/a>\u00a0by Kellogg professor\u00a0Victoria Medvec<\/a>, for instance, 83% of respondants named something they\u00a0had not\u00a0<\/em>done as their single most regrettable action over their entire lives.<\/p>\n

So it certainly pays to take the opportunities that come along, even if they put you on a slightly itinerant path. The key is finding ways to make personal connections wherever you are, and preserving the ones you value most.<\/p>\n

Roese recommends looking beyond workmates and colleagues. \u201cIf there\u2019s a way to move to a new city and make friends outside your area of work, that can be more nourishing, in part because if something is going bad at work, you have someone who\u2019s a more sympathetic ear for you. You can share intimate details without giving yourself away.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThis is where social media really\u00a0can<\/em>\u00a0help\u2014it\u2019s easier than ever to connect to people who share your interests and hobbies,\u201d says Roese.<\/p>\n

Reach Out for Needed Perspective<\/strong><\/p>\n

Roese also has advice for how we should rely on the close friendships we have managed to maintain. In addition to connection, he says, close friendships offer much needed perspective. As we reflect on our lives and our accomplishments, our friends can often see more clearly than we can the ways in which we have already succeeded.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

\n

\u201cWe don\u2019t always do this well,\u201d Roese says. \u201cToo often, we immediately imagine the ideal\u2014what\u2019s the best possible outcome. But we stop there. We don\u2019t take the time to pat ourselves on the back and feel a little bit better about all the great things we did.\u201d<\/p>\n

A classic example of this comes from another study by Victorica Medvec. In a\u00a0paper<\/a>\u00a0published after the 1992 Olympic games, she and her coauthors evaluated photos of athletes on the victory podium and found that bronze-medal winners expressed more positive emotions than silver medalists.<\/p>\n

\u201cThe bronze medalist compares downward and sees how easily they could have missed getting a medal at all, which made them better appreciate what they had actually achieved,\u201d Roese says. \u201cThe silver medalist looks upward to missing out on the gold, and so feels a bit worse because of missing out on an ideal outcome.\u201d<\/p>\n

When reflecting on our past, and making decisions about the future, using close friends as clear-eyed sounding boards can prevent us from making choices we will later regret.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s Never Too Late<\/strong><\/p>\n

And for those who do drift away from their friends\u2014it\u2019s never too late to be in touch. One of Roese\u2019s central insights is that regret is not simply a way to torture oneself on a sleepless night; it can also be an opportunity to change certain behaviors in a reasonable and targeted way.<\/p>\n

\u201cRegret hurts,\u201d he says, \u201cand so our immediate reaction is often to ignore it. But you might also listen to the signal that\u2019s inside that regret, and the signal might represent a lesson, or a useful kernel of truth if you crack open the shell. There\u2019s always time to change your behavior.\u201d<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

\n
\u5982\u4f55\u5728\u8ffd\u6c42\u4e8b\u4e1a\u53d1\u5c55\u7684\u8fc7\u7a0b\u4e2d\u4fdd\u6301\u575a\u56fa\u7684\u53cb\u8c0a<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n

\u5bf9\u4e8e\u8bb8\u591a\u804c\u6daf\u5fd7\u5411\u8fdc\u5927\u7684\u4eba\u6765\u8bf4\uff0c\u957f\u65f6\u95f4\u5de5\u4f5c\u548c\u5de5\u4f5c\u5730\u70b9\u7684\u53d8\u662f\u5fc5\u7136\u73b0\u8c61\u3002\u867d\u7136\u8fd9\u4e9b\u53ef\u80fd\u90fd\u662f\u826f\u597d\u7684\u9009\u62e9\uff0c\u4f46Kellogg\u5b66\u9662\u8425\u9500\u5b66\u6559\u6388Neal Roese<\/a>\u63d0\u9192\uff0c\u5982\u679c\u4f60\u5728\u5fd9\u788c\u7684\u5de5\u4f5c\u65e5\u7a0b\u4e2d\u727a\u7272\u4f60\u6700\u4eb2\u5bc6\u7684\u53cb\u8c0a\uff0c\u4f60\u65e5\u540e\u5f88\u53ef\u80fd\u611f\u5230\u540e\u6094\u3002<\/p>\n

Roese\u662f\u540e\u6094\u5b66\u3001\u5982\u4f55\u907f\u514d\u540e\u6094\uff0c\u4ee5\u53ca\u5982\u4f55\u5229\u7528\u540e\u6094\u505a\u51fa\u5e26\u7ed9\u81ea\u5df1\u957f\u671f\u6ee1\u8db3\u7684\u9009\u62e9\u7684\u6743\u5a01\u4e13\u5bb6\u3002<\/p>\n

\u201c\u4eba\u4eec\u503e\u5411\u4e8e\u5ffd\u7565\u5e26\u7ed9\u81ea\u5df1\u5e78\u798f\u611f\u7684\u6700\u91cd\u8981\u56e0\u7d20\u4e4b\u4e00\uff0c\u4e5f\u5c31\u662f\u6211\u4eec\u4e0e\u4ed6\u4eba\u7684\u8054\u7cfb\uff0c\u201d\u300aIf Only<\/a>\u300b\uff08\u4f46\u613f\uff09\u4e00\u4e66\u4f5c\u8005Roese\u8bf4\u3002\u201c\u6211\u4eec\u53d1\u73b0\uff0c\u4eba\u4eec\u7ecf\u5e38\u5bf9\u5931\u53bb\u8fd9\u4e9b\u8054\u7cfb\u611f\u5230\u6094\u6068\u3002\u201d<\/p>\n

\u975e\u7231\u60c5\u7c7b\u7684\u5173\u7cfb\u7279\u522b\u5bb9\u6613\u53d7\u5230\u5584\u610f\u7684\u5ffd\u7565\u3002\u201c\u6211\u4eec\u90fd\u77e5\u9053\u81ea\u5df1\u9700\u8981\u6295\u8d44\u65f6\u95f4\u7ecf\u8425\u4e0e\u914d\u5076\u6216\u4f34\u4fa3\u7684\u5173\u7cfb\uff0c\u201dRoese\u8bf4\u9053\u3002\u201c\u53ef\u80fd\u5e76\u4e0d\u90a3\u4e48\u663e\u800c\u6613\u89c1\u7684\u662f\uff0c\u7ef4\u7cfb\u4eb2\u5bc6\u7684\u53cb\u8c0a\u540c\u6837\u4e5f\u9700\u8981\u52aa\u529b\uff0c\u800c\u4e14\u8fd9\u79cd\u52aa\u529b\u662f\u503c\u5f97\u53bb\u505a\u7684\u3002\u201d<\/p>\n

\u90a3\u4e48\uff0c\u5373\u4f7f\u662f\u6700\u5fd9\u788c\u7684\u4eba\uff0c\u80fd\u505a\u4ec0\u4e48\u6765\u4fdd\u6301\u548c\u670b\u53cb\u7684\u4eb2\u8fd1\u5173\u7cfb\uff0c\u8ba9\u81ea\u5df1\u7684\u4eba\u751f\u5c3d\u53ef\u80fd\u4e0d\u540e\u6094\u5462\uff1fRoese\u63d0\u51fa\u4e86\u4e00\u4e9b\u7ecf\u8fc7\u7814\u7a76\u8bc1\u5b9e\u7684\u7b56\u7565\u3002<\/p>\n

\u8ba4\u8bc6\u81ea\u5df1\uff0c\u4e86\u89e3Facebook\u7684\u5c40\u9650<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u6211\u4eec\u90fd\u6e34\u671b\u5b89\u5168\u611f\u3001\u76ee\u6807\u3001\u7231\u60c5\u3001\u4f19\u4f34\u5173\u7cfb\u4ee5\u53ca\u5e26\u6765\u6210\u5c31\u611f\u7684\u5de5\u4f5c\u3002\u7136\u800c\u5f53\u8fd9\u4e9b\u9a71\u52a8\u56e0\u7d20\u53d1\u751f\u51b2\u7a81\uff0c\u4f8b\u5982\u8ffd\u6c42\u6709\u6210\u5c31\u611f\u7684\u5de5\u4f5c\u4e0e\u548c\u5468\u56f4\u7684\u4eba\u4fdd\u6301\u8054\u7cfb\u7684\u6e34\u671b\u53d1\u751f\u62b5\u89e6\u65f6\uff0c\u6211\u4eec\u672a\u5fc5\u603b\u80fd\u505a\u51fa\u6700\u7ec8\u8ba9\u6211\u4eec\u6700\u5e78\u798f\u7684\u9009\u62e9\u3002<\/p>\n

\u201c\u5bf9\u81ea\u5df1\u7684\u9009\u62e9\u6240\u4ea7\u751f\u7684\u7ed3\u679c\uff0c\u4eba\u4eec\u4e0d\u89c1\u5f97\u5584\u4e8e\u9884\u6d4b\u81ea\u5df1\u7684\u60c5\u7eea\u53cd\u5e94<\/a>\u201d\uff0cRoese\u8bf4\u3002\u201c\u7136\u800c\u4e8b\u540e\u56de\u987e\uff0c\u4eba\u4eec\u5c31\u80fd\u660e\u767d\u5f53\u65f6\u6700\u91cd\u8981\u7684\u662f\u4ec0\u4e48\u3002\u201d<\/p>\n

\u90a3\u4e48\uff0c\u6700\u91cd\u8981\u7684\u5230\u5e95\u662f\u4ec0\u4e48\uff1f\u867d\u7136\u8bb8\u591a\u4e13\u4e1a\u4eba\u58eb\u90fd\u6709\u7740\u4e0e\u804c\u4e1a\u751f\u6daf\u6216\u6c42\u5b66\u751f\u6daf\u76f8\u5173\u7684\u540e\u6094\uff0c\u4f46Roese\u81ea\u5df1\u7684\u7814\u7a76<\/a>\u53d1\u73b0\uff0c\u6211\u4eec\u6700\u5f3a\u70c8\u7684\u540e\u6094\u6709\u4e9b\u4e0e\u548c\u670b\u53cb\u5931\u53bb\u8054\u7cfb\u6709\u5173\u3002<\/p>\n

\u5bf9Roese\u6765\u8bf4\uff0c\u8fd9\u610f\u5473\u7740\u4eba\u4eec\u5e94\u66f4\u52aa\u529b\u7ef4\u62a4\u5bf9\u81ea\u5df1\u6700\u6709\u610f\u4e49\u7684\u5173\u7cfb\uff0c\u800c\u4e0d\u4ec5\u9650\u4e8e\u5728\u8138\u4e66\u4e0a\u7ed9\u67d0\u4eba\u7684\u5ea6\u5047\u7167\u7247\u70b9\u8d5e\u3002\u201c\u6211\u4eec\u770b\u5230\u7684\u662f\u4e00\u79cd\u5bf9\u4e8e\u4eb2\u5bc6\u8054\u7cfb\u7684\u6e34\u671b\uff0c\u201d\u4ed6\u8bf4\u3002\u201c\u5728\u793e\u4ea4\u5a92\u4f53\u5145\u65a5\u7684\u5e74\u4ee3\uff0c\u6211\u4eec\u53ef\u4ee5\u79f0\u547c\u8bb8\u591a\u4eba\u4e3a\u670b\u53cb\uff0c\u7136\u800c\u5f53\u4eba\u4eec\u5931\u53bb\u540e\u624d\u6000\u5ff5\u4e0d\u5df2\u7684\uff0c\u662f\u4e00\u4f4d\u4eb2\u5bc6\u5230\u53ef\u4ee5\u5206\u4eab\u751f\u6d3b\u4e0a\u79c1\u5bc6\u7ec6\u8282\u7684\u670b\u53cb\u3002\u8fd9\u7ecf\u5e38\u89c1\u4e8e\u4eba\u4eec\u5728\u4e8c\u3001\u4e09\u5341\u5c81\u65f6\u5efa\u7acb\uff0c\u800c\u5728\u56db\u3001\u4e94\u5341\u5c81\u65f6\u6d88\u901d\u7684\u91cd\u8981\u53cb\u8c0a\u3002\u4e8c\u5341\u591a\u5c81\u7684\u4eba\u6216\u8bb8\u4e0d\u4f1a\u4e86\u89e3\uff0c\u751f\u6d3b\u4e2d\u6709\u8bb8\u591a\u5916\u529b\u4f1a\u968f\u7740\u4ed6\u4eec\u5e74\u7eaa\u589e\u957f\uff0c\u4f7f\u4ed6\u4eec\u4e0e\u670b\u53cb\u7684\u5173\u7cfb\u8d8a\u6765\u8d8a\u8fdc\u3002<\/p>\n

\u4ed8\u51fa\u52aa\u529b<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u4fdd\u6301\u4eb2\u5bc6\u53cb\u8c0a\u6700\u7b80\u5355\u7684\u65b9\u5f0f\u4e4b\u4e00\uff0c\u662f\u5c06\u8fd9\u4ef6\u4e8b\u5217\u5165\u4f60\u7684\u65e5\u7a0b\u8868\u3002<\/p>\n

\u201c\u5f53\u4eba\u4eec\u5de5\u4f5c\u548c\u5bb6\u5ead\u751f\u6d3b\u5f00\u59cb\u53d8\u5f97\u5fd9\u788c\u65f6\uff0c\u6700\u5148\u653e\u5f03\u7684\u5c31\u662f\u8fc7\u53bb\u6bcf\u5468\u6216\u6bcf\u6708\u4e0e\u670b\u53cb\u7684\u805a\u4f1a\uff0c\u201dRoese\u8bf4\u3002<\/p>\n

\u8fd9\u5bf9\u7537\u6027\u6765\u8bf4\u5c24\u5176\u5982\u6b64\u3002Roese\u89e3\u91ca\u9053\uff0c\u5173\u4e8e\u4eba\u4eec\u5982\u4f55\u7ef4\u6301\u53cb\u8c0a\uff0c\u6587\u732e\u4e2d\u6709\u6027\u522b\u5dee\u5f02<\/a>\u7684\u6709\u8da3\u8bb0\u8f7d\u3002\u5973\u6027\u8f83\u64c5\u957f\u7ef4\u6301\u4e00\u5bf9\u4e00\u7684\u8054\u7cfb\uff0c\u5373\u793e\u4f1a\u5fc3\u7406\u5b66\u5bb6\u6240\u79f0\u7684\u201c\u4e8c\u4eba\u7ec4\u201d\u3002Roese\u8bf4\uff1a\u201c\u4e8c\u4eba\u7ec4\u8054\u7cfb\u662f\u5973\u6027\u7684\u4e13\u957f\uff0c\u7537\u6027\u5219\u8f83\u64c5\u957f\u7ec4\u6210\u5c0f\u56e2\u4f53\uff0c\u50cf\u662f\u8fd0\u52a8\u961f\u3002\u7537\u6027\u9700\u8981\u4ed8\u51fa\u989d\u5916\u7684\u52aa\u529b\uff0c\u624d\u4f1a\u4fdd\u7559\u65f6\u95f4\u7ecf\u8425\u4e00\u5bf9\u4e00\u7684\u53cb\u8c0a\u3002\u201d<\/p>\n

\u5fd7\u5411\u53ef\u4ee5\u8fdc\u5927\uff0c\u4f46\u8981\u7ef4\u62a4\u4f60\u91cd\u89c6\u7684\u4e1c\u897f<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u7ef4\u62a4\u53cb\u8c0a\u4e0d\u4e00\u5b9a\u610f\u5473\u7740\u9650\u5236\u81ea\u5df1\u7684\u8fdc\u5927\u5fd7\u5411\u6216\u62d2\u7edd\u8ffd\u6c42\u53ef\u80fd\u6253\u7834\u56e2\u4f53\u611f\u7684\u673a\u4f1a\u3002\u4e8b\u5b9e\u4e0a\uff0c\u63a2\u8ba8\u540e\u6094\u7684\u6587\u732e\u8868\u660e\uff0c\u5192\u9669\u8005\u4f1a\u5f97\u5230\u66f4\u5927\u7684\u6ee1\u8db3\u611f\u3002<\/p>\n

\u201c\u5927\u91cf\u7684\u7814\u7a76\u663e\u793a\uff0c\u5f53\u6211\u4eec\u9047\u5230\u4e00\u4e2a\u673a\u4f1a\u5e76\u6293\u4f4f\u5b83\u65f6\uff0c\u6211\u4eec\u4e0d\u592a\u53ef\u80fd\u611f\u5230\u540e\u6094\uff0c\u56e0\u4e3a\u6211\u4eec\u975e\u5e38\u5584\u4e8e\u8c03\u6574\u81ea\u5df1\u6765\u914d\u5408\u51fa\u73b0\u7684\u4e8b\u7269\u3002\u4f46\u662f\uff0c\u5f53\u6211\u4eec\u6ca1\u6709\u6293\u4f4f\u673a\u4f1a\u65f6\uff0c\u6211\u4eec\u5c31\u4f1a\u4e00\u76f4\u53d7\u5230\u6293\u4f4f\u673a\u4f1a\u5c06\u662f\u600e\u6837\u7684\u5149\u666f\u7684\u5ff5\u5934\u6240\u6298\u78e8\u3002<\/p>\n

\u4f8b\u5982\uff0c\u5728Kellogg\u6559\u6388Victoria Medvec<\/a>\u8fdb\u884c\u7684\u4e00\u9879\u7814\u7a76<\/a>\u4e2d\uff0c\u670983%\u7684\u53d7\u8bbf\u8005\u6307\u51fa\u81ea\u5df1\u4eba\u751f\u4e2d\u6700\u540e\u6094\u6ca1\u6709\u53bb\u505a\u7684\u4e00\u4ef6\u4e8b\u3002<\/p>\n

\u7531\u6b64\u53ef\u89c1\uff0c\u673a\u4f1a\u6765\u4e34\u65f6\u786e\u5b9e\u5e94\u8be5\u628a\u63e1\uff0c\u5373\u4f7f\u5b83\u4eec\u8ba9\u4f60\u8d70\u5411\u4e00\u6761\u66f4\u4e0d\u5e73\u5766\u7684\u9053\u8def\u3002\u5173\u952e\u662f\u4e0d\u7ba1\u4f60\u5728\u54ea\u91cc\uff0c\u90fd\u8981\u627e\u5230\u5efa\u7acb\u4eba\u9645\u5173\u7cfb\u7684\u65b9\u6cd5\uff0c\u5e76\u7ef4\u62a4\u4f60\u6700\u91cd\u89c6\u7684\u53cb\u60c5\u3002<\/p>\n

Roese\u5efa\u8bae\u5c06\u7ed3\u4ea4\u5bf9\u8c61\u6269\u5c55\u5230\u5de5\u4f5c\u4f19\u4f34\u548c\u540c\u4e8b\u4ee5\u5916\u3002\u201c\u5982\u679c\u6709\u529e\u6cd5\u80fd\u8fc1\u5c45\u5230\u4e00\u4e2a\u65b0\u57ce\u5e02\u5e76\u5728\u4f60\u5de5\u4f5c\u5730\u533a\u4ee5\u5916\u7684\u5730\u65b9\u4ea4\u670b\u53cb\uff0c\u53ef\u80fd\u4f1a\u66f4\u6709\u76ca\uff0c\u90e8\u5206\u539f\u56e0\u662f\u5de5\u4f5c\u4e0d\u987a\u5229\u65f6\uff0c\u4f60\u4f1a\u6709\u4e00\u4e2a\u66f4\u5584\u89e3\u4eba\u610f\u7684\u670b\u53cb\u542c\u4f60\u8bc9\u82e6\u3002\u4f60\u53ef\u4ee5\u6beb\u65e0\u987e\u5fcc\u5730\u5206\u4eab\u79c1\u5bc6\u7ec6\u8282\u3002\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201c\u8fd9\u662f\u793e\u4ea4\u5a92\u4f53\u786e\u5b9e\u53ef\u4ee5\u5e2e\u5fd9\u7684\u5730\u65b9\uff0c\u5b83\u8ba9\u4eba\u4eec\u6bd4\u4ee5\u5f80\u66f4\u5bb9\u6613\u627e\u5230\u6709\u7740\u540c\u6837\u5174\u8da3\u4e0e\u7231\u597d\u7684\u4eba\uff0c\u201dRoese\u5982\u662f\u8bf4\u3002<\/p>\n

\u83b7\u5f97\u9700\u8981\u7684\u89c2\u70b9<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u5bf9\u4e8e\u6211\u4eec\u5e94\u8be5\u5982\u4f55\u4f9d\u8d56\u6211\u4eec\u52aa\u529b\u7ef4\u7cfb\u7684\u4eb2\u5bc6\u53cb\u8c0a\uff0cRoese\u4e5f\u63d0\u51fa\u5efa\u8bae\u3002\u9664\u4e86\u4fdd\u6301\u8054\u7cfb\u5916\uff0c\u4eb2\u5bc6\u7684\u53cb\u8c0a\u8fd8\u80fd\u63d0\u4f9b\u975e\u5e38\u6709\u9700\u8981\u7684\u89c2\u70b9\u3002\u5f53\u6211\u4eec\u53cd\u601d\u81ea\u5df1\u7684\u4eba\u751f\u548c\u6210\u5c31\u65f6\uff0c\u670b\u53cb\u5f80\u5f80\u53ef\u4ee5\u6446\u8131\u6211\u4eec\u65e2\u5b9a\u7684\u601d\u7ef4\u6a21\u5f0f\uff0c\u4ee5\u6bd4\u6211\u4eec\u66f4\u6e05\u6670\u7684\u773c\u5149\u6765\u770b\u4e8b\u7269\u3002<\/p>\n

\u201c\u6211\u4eec\u4e0d\u4e00\u5b9a\u603b\u80fd\u505a\u5f97\u8fd9\u4e48\u597d\uff0c\u201dRoese\u8bf4\u3002\u201c\u6709\u592a\u591a\u65f6\u5019\uff0c\u6211\u4eec\u7acb\u5373\u60f3\u8c61\u6700\u7406\u60f3\u7684\u72b6\u51b5\uff0c\u4e5f\u5c31\u662f\u53ef\u80fd\u7684\u6700\u4f73\u7ed3\u679c\u662f\u4ec0\u4e48\u3002\u4f46\u6211\u4eec\u5c31\u505c\u5728\u90a3\u91cc\u3002\u6211\u4eec\u4e0d\u4f1a\u82b1\u65f6\u95f4\u62cd\u62cd\u81ea\u5df1\u7684\u80cc\uff0c\u5bf9\u81ea\u5df1\u6240\u6709\u7684\u6210\u5c31\u611f\u5230\u81ea\u8c6a\u3002\u201d<\/p>\n

\u80fd\u663e\u73b0\u8fd9\u79cd\u73b0\u8c61\u7684\u4e00\u4e2a\u7ecf\u5178\u5b9e\u4f8b\uff0c\u6765\u81ea\u4e8eVictorica Medvec\u6240\u505a\u7684\u53e6\u4e00\u9879\u7814\u7a76\u3002\u5728\u4e00\u7bc71992\u5e74\u5965\u8fd0\u4f1a\u4e4b\u540e\u53d1\u8868\u7684\u8bba\u6587<\/a>\u4e2d\uff0c\u5979\u548c\u5171\u540c\u4f5c\u8005\u5206\u6790\u4e86\u9881\u5956\u53f0\u4e0a\u7684\u83b7\u80dc\u9009\u624b\u7167\u7247\uff0c\u53d1\u73b0\u94dc\u724c\u5f97\u4e3b\u6bd4\u94f6\u724c\u9009\u624b\u5c55\u73b0\u51fa\u66f4\u6b63\u9762\u7684\u60c5\u7eea\u3002<\/p>\n

\u201c\u94dc\u724c\u5f97\u4e3b\u5411\u4e0b\u6bd4\u8f83\uff0c\u77e5\u9053\u81ea\u5df1\u6709\u53ef\u80fd\u5b8c\u5168\u62ff\u4e0d\u5230\u5956\u724c\uff0c\u56e0\u6b64\u8ba9\u4ed6\u4eec\u66f4\u611f\u6fc0\u81ea\u5df1\u5b9e\u9645\u4e0a\u7684\u6210\u7ee9\u8868\u73b0\uff0c\u201dRoese\u8bf4\u3002\u201c\u94f6\u724c\u5f97\u4e3b\u5411\u4e0a\u770b\uff0c\u770b\u5230\u81ea\u5df1\u9519\u5931\u91d1\u724c\uff0c\u4e8e\u662f\u611f\u89c9\u66f4\u7cdf\uff0c\u56e0\u4e3a\u81ea\u5df1\u6ca1\u80fd\u8fbe\u5230\u7406\u60f3\u7684\u7ed3\u679c\u3002\u201d<\/p>\n

\u5f53\u6211\u4eec\u53cd\u601d\u8fc7\u53bb\uff0c\u5e76\u5bf9\u672a\u6765\u505a\u51fa\u51b3\u5b9a\u65f6\uff0c\u7528\u4eb2\u5bc6\u7684\u670b\u53cb\u505a\u4e3a\u4e00\u9762\u660e\u955c\u53ef\u4ee5\u907f\u514d\u81ea\u5df1\u505a\u51fa\u5c06\u6765\u4f1a\u540e\u6094\u7684\u9009\u62e9\u3002<\/p>\n

\u6c38\u8fdc\u4e0d\u4f1a\u592a\u8fdf<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u5bf9\u4e8e\u90a3\u4e9b\u4e0e\u670b\u53cb\u5931\u8054\u7684\u4eba\u6765\u8bf4\uff0c\u91cd\u65b0\u6062\u590d\u8054\u7cfb\u6c38\u8fdc\u4e0d\u5acc\u665a\u3002Roese\u6709\u4e00\u4e2a\u4e2d\u5fc3\u89c2\u70b9\uff0c\u5c31\u662f\u540e\u6094\u4e0d\u4ec5\u4ec5\u662f\u5931\u7720\u7684\u591c\u91cc\u81ea\u6211\u6298\u78e8\u7684\u4e00\u79cd\u65b9\u5f0f\uff1b\u5b83\u4e5f\u80fd\u6210\u4e3a\u4e00\u4e2a\u4ee5\u5408\u7406\u3001\u6709\u76ee\u6807\u7684\u65b9\u5f0f\u6539\u53d8\u67d0\u4e9b\u884c\u4e3a\u7684\u826f\u673a\u3002<\/p>\n

\u4ed6\u8bf4\uff1a\u201c\u540e\u6094\u8ba9\u4eba\u5fc3\u75db\uff0c\u56e0\u6b64\u6211\u4eec\u7b2c\u4e00\u53cd\u5e94\u5f80\u5f80\u662f\u5ffd\u89c6\u5b83\u3002\u4f46\u4f60\u6216\u8bb8\u5e94\u8be5\u542c\u542c\u540e\u6094\u6240\u4f20\u8fbe\u7684\u4fe1\u606f\uff0c\u8be5\u4fe1\u606f\u6216\u8bb8\u4ee3\u8868\u7740\u5b9d\u8d35\u7684\u4e00\u8bfe\uff0c\u6216\u662f\u5f53\u4f60\u62e8\u5f00\u8868\u9762\u540e\uff0c\u4f1a\u53d1\u73b0\u4e00\u4e2a\u53d7\u7528\u4e0d\u5c3d\u7684\u771f\u76f8\u3002\u8981\u6539\u53d8\u4f60\u7684\u884c\u4e3a\uff0c\u6c38\u8fdc\u90fd\u4e0d\u4f1a\u592a\u8fdf\u3002\u201d<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

Source:\u00a0https:\/\/insight.kellogg.northwestern.edu\/article\/how-to-maintain-strong-friendships-as-you-move-through-your-career?utm_source=subscriber&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=pianomailer102020&pnespid=kfY3t6BVVw_N5F0l_9mTdgggMq_E11HQZ2mJy4cw<\/a><\/h3>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

What the science of regret says...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[11,9],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-28820","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-business","category-opinion"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lapost.us\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/28820","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lapost.us\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lapost.us\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lapost.us\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lapost.us\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=28820"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/lapost.us\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/28820\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":28822,"href":"https:\/\/lapost.us\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/28820\/revisions\/28822"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lapost.us\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=28820"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lapost.us\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=28820"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lapost.us\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=28820"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}