{"id":83390,"date":"2026-08-24T19:31:59","date_gmt":"2026-08-25T02:31:59","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/lapost.us\/?p=83390"},"modified":"2026-08-24T19:31:59","modified_gmt":"2026-08-25T02:31:59","slug":"a-three-year-old-tries-to-cope-without-his-beloved-papi","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lapost.us\/?p=83390","title":{"rendered":"A Three-Year-Old Tries to Cope Without his Beloved Papi"},"content":{"rendered":"
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By<\/span>MindSite News<\/a><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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This story was reported by MindSite News\u00a0and\u00a0was produced in partnership with\u00a0CatchLight<\/a>\u00a0as part of its three-year\u00a0Mental Health Visual Reporting Initiative<\/a>.<\/em><\/p>\n

Text by Cora Cervantes. Photos by Julie Leopo for MindSite News\/CatchLight<\/strong><\/p>\n

When the father of pre-schooler Carlos Carino* was taken into custody in Los Angeles last September by ICE agents and brought to a detention center in California\u2019s Central Valley, the changes in Carlos were immediately evident.<\/p>\n

He refused to participate in circle time at preschool. He cried frequently in school and at home. And he started calling everyone \u2018Papi,\u2019 \u2013 Daddy in English, but also a term of endearment for children in Latin American countries.<\/p>\n

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For six months, the family navigated the separation as they fought in court for the release of Carlos\u2019s father, Miguel Carino*. They had reason for hope \u2013 or so they believed.<\/p>\n

Carlos is like one of every five children in California \u2013\u00a0they live in mixed-status families<\/a>\u00a0in which at least one member is undocumented; across the country, there are some 4.7 million mixed-status households. As these families cope with aggressive immigration enforcement, a parent\u2019s detention can launch them into multiple layers of trauma, buffeted by events they can\u2019t control.<\/p>\n

The consequences are severe: A\u00a0report<\/a>\u00a0by six psychiatrists in Psychiatric News noted that prolonged separation between children and their immigrant parents \u201ccan undermine attachment security and increase children\u2019s vulnerability to anxiety, depression, and behavioral problems.\u201d<\/p>\n

Carlos\u2019 father had been living in Los Angeles for nearly 25 years, owned a small construction business in his neighborhood of East Los Angeles and employed other workers. Jazmin, his wife of five years, is a U.S. citizen, and Miguel had applied for an \u201cadjustment of status\u201d based on his marriage. Then he was detained during what his attorneys assumed would be a routine check-in with U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Enforcement (USCIS).<\/p>\n

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Jazmin Carino has taken on additional housekeeping work to support her family since her husband\u2019s detention and subsequent self-deportation.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n

Jazmin, 24, tried to keep the family connected while taking on extra house-cleaning shifts. She and Carlos started making the five-hour round-trip to the Central Valley twice a month. But the visits were painful, and they distressed Carlitos.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe couldn\u2019t hold hands, we couldn\u2019t get up from our seats,\u201d Jazmin recalled. \u201cWhen it was time to say good-bye, my son didn\u2019t want to let go of him.\u201d<\/p>\n

But after a while, even these constrained visits seemed to help Carlos. One morning, he arrived at his pre-school wearing a hand-knit beanie that his father had made for him.<\/p>\n

\u201cHe kept it on all day and was happier than he had been,\u201d recalled Ana Soto*, an early education assistant at the preschool. He wore the beanie daily, as if he were wearing a piece of his father.<\/p>\n

\u201cOne day, I called for him: \u2018Papi, come over here,\u2019\u201d Soto said. \u201cHe looked at me and said, \u2018I am not Papi, I am Carlos.\u2019\u201d To Soto, that signaled a greater sense of security.<\/p>\n

But in March, faced with the prospect of his likely deportation and exhausted by the brutal conditions at the detention center, Miguel decided to self-deport to Tijuana, Mexico. Jazmin tried to cope, taking Carlos to visit him in Tijuana. Then, in April, Miguel moved further south to Mexico City so he could seek work to support himself. Mexico City is far away, and the family does not have the resources to fly there. Carlos hasn\u2019t seen his father in person for three months and it\u2019s unclear when he will see him again. Now the family must try to stay connected through video and phone calls, and Carlo\u2019s confidence and ease are fading again.<\/p>\n

When a parent is taken away, a child\u2019s world collapses. Being forcibly separated from family members can cause emotional deregulation and ratchet up their insecurities, says Tatiana Londo\u00f1o, an assistant professor of social welfare at UCLA\u2019s Luskin School of Public Affairs.\u00a0 Her work explores the ways that Latino immigrants navigate and adapt to detention, deportation and family separation.<\/p>\n

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Separation is not merely stressful for young children \u2014 it is toxic.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

\u2013Clinician commentary, New England Journal of Medicine<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

\u201cEven a small separation from parents, no matter how short, can have a rupture on that child\u2019s developmental well-being,\u201d Londo\u00f1o says. \u201cWe are leaving a long-term, potentially multi-generational impact on these families.\u201d<\/p>\n

Children learn that a parent \u2013 the person they most rely on \u2013 \u201cis no longer my secure base,\u201d Londo\u00f1o says. \u201cThey learn that no one is safe for them. They might have issues in future relationships, or they might not be able to discern a healthy relationship from an unhealthy relationship.\u201d<\/p>\n

Studies show that exposure to harsh immigration enforcement and separation from a primary caregiver is a form of \u201ctoxic stress\u201c that increases future risks of physical and mental illness. Such risks are heightened when they occur on top of \u201cprior exposure to violence, poverty, and family loss in countries of origin,\u201d according to the Psychiatric News report.<\/p>\n

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Jazmin touches her son\u2019s hand-knit beanie \u2014 a gift his father made for him while in immigration detention. His preschool teacher noticed Carlos was \u201chappier than he had been\u201d on the days he wore it.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n

A 2022 study in the Journal of Policy Analysis and Management looked at the ways that the children of immigrants living near Morristown, Tennessee, were affected over the year following\u00a0 a massive immigration raid in that community. The researchers found \u201ca substantial spike in absences from school in the month of the raid and significant increases in exclusionary disciplinary actions and in diagnoses of substance use disorder, depression, self-harm, suicide attempts or ideation, and sexual abuse.\u201d<\/p>\n

Another study,\u00a0published in 2020 in the Journal of Traumatic Stress,<\/a>\u00a0looked at 458 migrant children and adolescents who were seen in mental health clinics and found that 43% of them were diagnosed with PTSD and 24% with depression. Of those, almost half of the children \u2014 49% \u2014 said they were experiencing three or more problematic behaviors ranging from academic problems and skipping or acting out in school to substance use, having suicidal thoughts or attempts, or being physically aggressive towards others.<\/p>\n

In a commentary\u00a0published in March in the New England Journal of Medicine<\/a>, a team of clinicians and researchers made this point:<\/p>\n

\u201cFor physicians, mental health clinicians, and public health professionals, the evidence is unequivocal: separating parents and caregivers from young children causes preventable, policy-driven trauma with long-term consequences for child health and development. Separation is not merely stressful for young children \u2014 it is toxic.\u201d<\/p>\n

Compounding the problem is that at the very moment ICE raids are creating trauma, the Trump administration is also cutting food assistance and other services that help support families in distress. Londo\u00f1o and other advocates are urging the state of California to help fill the gap by increasing funding to organizations working to meet immigrant families\u2019 basic needs so parents can be \u201cemotionally available to their children.\u201d<\/p>\n

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Jazmin walks Carlos home from his early childhood education program in Los Angeles. Since her husband\u2019s departure, she relies on family and community for support in caring for their son.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n

She also knows her family is far from alone. She has seen families from as far away as Florida waiting to visit their spouses in the lobby of Central Valley Annex, the massive detention center run for ICE by GEO Group, the private prison company.<\/p>\n

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We are leaving a long-term, potentially multi-generational impact on these families.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

\u2013Tatiana Londo\u00f1o, assistant professor at UCLA\u2019s Luskin School of Public Affairs<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

\u201cI recall a woman with six children, including one child with autism and a newborn,\u201d Jazmin said. \u201cI saw newborns from out of state visiting and being held by their fathers for the very first time.\u201d<\/p>\n

Carino hopes she may one day be able to bring her husband back to the United States and reunite her family. For now, though, she is focused on economic survival \u2013\u00a0and easing the emotional impact on Carlos, who turned 3 in May.<\/p>\n

His preschool\u00a0threw a party for him and the family celebrated via a video call with Miguel in Mexico City. To his mother, it was bittersweet: It was Carlitos\u2019 first birthday without his Papi.<\/p>\n

The name \u201cMindSite News\u201d is used with the express permission of Mindsight Institute, an educational organization offering online learning and in-person workshops in the field of mental health and wellbeing. MindSite News and Mindsight Institute are separate, unaffiliated entities that are aligned in making science accessible and promoting mental health globally.<\/em><\/p>\n

CORA CERVANTES<\/h2>\n
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Cora Cervantes is a freelance journalist based in Los Angeles. Her work has appeared on NBC News, MSNBC, Latino USA, Al Jazeera, and NAHJ: palabra.<\/p>\n

PHOTOS BY JULIE LEOPO<\/h2>\n

Julie Leopo is an award-winning California-based photojournalist who explores culture, politics, identity, and social issues and has a passion for amplifying the stories of bicultural and bilingual communities through her photography. Leopo also teaches photojournalism at Chapman University.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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